When two people live in a house together, one of them will spend more time at the house than the other. Perhaps over the course of a month, it's only 10 minutes more than the other. Perhaps, for one reason or another, it's measured in days and weeks.
While I'm on sabbatical, I travel about looking very important, talking to people about the retirement thing. Then I come home. Abby, my wife, is a busy church leader type who also travels about and also looks important, talking to people about rescuing Protestantism. During this sabbatical thing she has many more appointments than I have and actually goes to work and gets things done. I sit around thinking deep thoughts, often about how and why people retire. Sometimes I write them down.
Occasionally, when I am sitting at home without a deep thought at the moment, I get up and straighten the kitchen a little. I'm not the fastidious type, but I might as well. Maybe I clean off the dining room table. You know. Not that I care about it. And then Abby comes home and puts her purse on the table! Right where I just cleaned! It's sort of an insult, don't you think? If this is what retirement is going to be like, we are in deep trouble. How do moms (or dads) who stay at home cope with such constant disrespect? Yeesh. It took me quite a while to come to this perspective. Perhaps I should focus on keeping my office perfect and not care about the common spaces. I'll try that. Or the yard. I guess you have to be careful what you care for when you have some space to choose.